Sometimes It’s Hard To Be Grateful, And That’s OK
It’s that time of your when people are posting their lists on social media of all the things they are grateful for. It’s 2020 and maybe that’s why many people didn’t start posting on the first of the month. For many people, it’s been a hellish year. Many have experienced serious illness, deaths among friends and family, unemployment, job changes, and all kinds of unfortunate, horrible things. Sometimes it’s hard to be grateful, and that’s OK.
I could go on about why this year has sucked for me, but I won’t. That’s not my style. Even if that was my style, I doubt you’d want to read it. Admittedly though, this post will be a little bit self-centred. I’m going to share 10 things I’m grateful for. It’s probably going to take some work to make a list of 10 things, and that’s OK.
Even in difficult times it’s important to remember what we are grateful for, perhaps even more important than when things are going well. Listing what we are grateful for can help remind us of the good things in our lives and help break us out of cycles of depression, frustration, and despair.
I’m grateful for:
1. My parents who help ensure I have a roof over my head and food in my stomach and who have always loved and supported me in their own way
2. My daughter who gives me a reason to keep trying, working, and persevering through the struggles
3. My sister who is willing to listen when I need it and who helps make life fun and slightly more sane through sharing fandoms and meme dumps
4. My lifelong friends. There are a few of you. One of the most hurtful things Your continued friendship through the years means more than you know
5. My cat Ellie, who is a cranky old girl, but is affectionate, devoted, and has just about the softest coat of fur I’ve ever felt
6. People who don’t really know me, but are still willing to let me cite them, have little interactions, or do little things to be supportive like Conner Drigotas, Michelle MacCutcheon, Ginger Johnson, Lauren McKinnon, and Sarah Kawamura
7. The people I call “Long Distance Mentors” who I have never met and perhaps never will. These individuals are successful people who want to help others build a better life. In this group I include people James Altucher, Gary Vaynerchuk, Daymond John, Dean Graziosi, Tony Robbins, Marie Forleo, Simon Sinek, Tim Ferriss, Srinivas Rao, and Gillian Perkins. The content they provide to others is absolutely amazing
8. My experience working for a provider of services for people who experience intellectual/developmental disabilities. It was a frustrating job at times, but helped me learn and grow as a person
9. Music. I don’t think I need to explain this one. If music resonates with your soul, you know how important and meaningful it can be
10. Stories. Whether told orally, in film, or through the written word stories can convey so much meaning, prompt, inspire, and draw out other emotions, as well as offer an escape.
There! It took me a while, but even with as rough as 2020 has been, I managed to come up with 10 things I am grateful for. As you may have noticed, mostly I’m grateful for people. Non-tangible things like ideas, concepts, and emotions conveyed through words or music make up most of the rest of my list. People, ideas, and concepts are not only of great worth, but they can be carried through life and are things we can take with us no matter where we go.
A Grateful Mindset
This year feels like I’ve been beaten down and held down. It’s been easy to find reasons to complain or be bitter, depressed, envious, or angry. Even still, I was able to list 10 things I’m grateful for.
Sometimes it’s hard to be grateful, and that’s OK. In our lowest moments we may have to look at the simple, or the past. “I am grateful I can breathe without issue.” “I’m grateful I was able to go to Disneyland when I was 10.” “I’m thankful I have food on my table.”
Gratitude is a mindset. When we are having trouble coming up with something we are thankful for our mindset is most likely negative. Our mindset is probably being controlled by depression, anger, or frustration. If we are able to think of just one thing we are grateful for though, we begin to break that control. The more things we can think of that we are grateful for, the easier it is to think of more things we are thankful for.
We are sentient beings. We have our own personality and intelligence. Perhaps most importantly, we have the ability to make our own choices. Having a thankful mindset of gratitude is a choice. It begins with making a simple choice to find things to be grateful for. It isn’t always easy. Sometimes it’s hard to be grateful, and that’s OK.
Garrett Leeds is the founder of the Life, Liberty, and Pursuit of Happiness Project
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